Neglect

Turns everything shabby no? Every two minutes though I have a new thing I feel like writing about but then I get distracted by a bag of crisps, Dope Wars, cookies, the Wii, a cup of tea, old Seinfeld episodes or Adonis. My life has deteriorated to a nutshell of domesticity of the worst kind where dirty laundry piles on and mornings are a frantic rush to make class on time coupled with a hurling of the bag with wild abandon as I hurl myself on to the bed at 3 when I hit home.

Not feeling particularly great these days either. A momentary lapse into self-doubt has me wondering why the fuck I'm doing law anyway and whether my firm was insane to grant me this training contract. So I can have a semi-decent conversation in a few languages. So what? I just feel so bloody mediocre. Following my LLM I had a massive shot of confidence, the giddy type that makes you smile at strangers, teeth a-glintin', eyebrow raised saying, "Yeah I just did my master's degree. And passed it." Piece of piss in hindsight. Then the GDL came along and my swagger subsided until I got my results. Beam beam beam. Then Dewey & LeBoeuf hired little ol' me and had I been taller, more ample-chested and blonde, I'd have been unstoppable. But then a few rejections came piling in and this was after I'd had a chance to dazzle them with my wit and charm. Whatevs, thought I. You lose some right? And anyway, I liked D&L best. And now here comes the LPC with their "practice" tests designed to make you feel like a twat, telling you things like you're borderline competent because your writing style is too formal and you use too much legal jargon. Maybe I should just write in the preferred style of yoof today wid bad speling and sum fuked up gramer rite lol? Ah they're right those LPC people. I need to do summink and fast. I need to get me back on top o' de class, pronto.

And I can't say I'm looking forward to going home for the 2 weeks of Christmas what with this wave of religiosity sweeping my family. But that's a whole 'nother story.

Reading back over what I just wrote I sound supremely self-congratulatory. Clap clap June. Pat on back. Well done me. It actually isn't self-congratulatory at all. It's just that my supreme ego can't self-deprecate without sneaking in some self-praise. And if I can't cheer myself on in my own blog, where can I?

To you readers out there (all 2 and a half of you), please don't feel alienated. Please do come back and leave me comments and brighten my day. I'm off to do my last civil litigation workshop prep ever ever. And drown my sorrows in some Walkers salt 'n' vinegar crisps.