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Crapples. I am so tired and just emotionally drained from the crap I have been putting myself through. For those in the know, I failed a module and now feel like the nice little world I've built in my head has come crashing down. My future job hangs in the balance and I'm just waiting for the powers that be to come back to me and tell me what to do. I was a wreck for a while, eating very little and isolating myself from the well-meaning folk who'd call to congratulate or go out and par-tay. Instead I chose to stay at home with the only person I can be with in times of a crisis, the only person in the vicinity who cries if I cry and bleeds if I bleed, and watch reruns of Sex and the City.

But today feels a little different. I started studying for my re-sits and, as I cram a fistful of Party Rings in my mouth and absorb the sugar rush, I don't feel as depressed about it as I should.

Things between Adonis and I have started to become a little more serious. A few more parties are involved, namely my family. Scary people are on board and things that used to seem so far-fetched are now within reach. Adonis will be coming to Bahrain and I couldn't be happier about my personal life, my lovely little relationship. All this is making me very happy.

But fuck, where am I heading? I am currently without a long-term job. I am not on my way to train as a lawyer and this is scaring the shit out of me. Relocation may be on the cards or it may not, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know a thing and I am terrified. But at least throughout it all, Adonis will be there to hold my hand.

Before I leave this badly-written entry, I would like to post a lovely little picture of my current favourite drink. This bad boy is called the Pornstar Martini and it's made with passion fruit and served, weirdly, with a shot of champagne. Here we is:


Mon dieu, 'tis good.